my history

[grandmaD]

gD -- . Then, I went down by 0.4 mg, which is 2% of my original dose. I did a drop every 2-3 weeks, which was the absolute fastest I could tolerate.
.

Okay, based on this method of tapering, my drops have been .72 then .54 then .72 then .54 which is a bit weird seeing as it is 5% each time. They are the last 4 drops and next 4 are .54. These figures are based on the weight of the tablet. At least from now on they are seem to be .54 which is more consistent.

[Sheila]

I'm confused. Are you doing 5% of original dose or 5% of current dose or 5% of the weight of the current tablet or what?

[grandmaD]

I'm confused. Are you doing 5% of original dose or 5% of current dose or 5% of the weight of the current tablet or what?

I am doing 5% of previous dose.
eg
Taper so far has been:
9.0
8.6
8.1
7.7
7.3
6.6
These figures were told to me to be 5%... and I am going by the figures given to me and the doses given to me.

[grandmaD]

Week 4 @ 6.6 summary

The Good
The itchies, backaches and cramps continue to improve; naseau and dizzy spells improved but still come and go.
Did a short (20min) walk and couldn’t keep going up the hill to get back home, with head pressure and palpitations. Just then the neighbour across the road pulled up and offered me a lift! I can’t begin to tell you what a relief that was!

The Bad
Weakness, tiredness, slowness, heaviness continued to get worse and worse
Head banging frequency same but intensity up from mild to moderate
Body vibrations increased in frequency and intensity
Palpitations increased
Breathless pretty much all day every day, struggling to get my breath, doing breathing exercises every hour, sometimes more. Not sure it helps, but do it anyway.
Sleep issues the same except one night was 3 hours to get to sleep

The Ugly
Pressure heads high all day early in week. Then became vibrating heads high in intensity and some days I couldn’t tell if pressure or vibrating or both, felt like both.
1 tension headache in bed all day
Increase in vibrating heads in frequency and in intensity

Overall
Horrible time with hi pressure heads and then vibrating heads; combined with increase in body vibrations and struggling to breathe; the naseau and dizzy coming and going…fed up.

Had to go to town 2 days ago (for hubby) and the crazy head went thru the roof again – I was in the shops.. 2 hours walking…to much…or the lights…I’ve read people have trouble with fleuro lights. I hadn’t missed tablet or taken it at a different time. Spent rest of time lying in car. Got home and head was about to explode. Felt like I was dying! Next day a tension h/ache and spent day in bed. Wanted to die… can understand why people do.. . do not worry, I will not do anything stupid, it just would be a welcome relief, and I know I will improve eventually… Feeling low, flat, tired, weepy… Will get a video and spend today on the couch.

[Sheila]

I am doing 5% of previous dose.
eg
Taper so far has been:
9.0
8.6
8.1
7.7
7.3
6.6
These figures were told to me to be 5%... and I am going by the figures given to me and the doses given to me.

All of these are approximately 5% drops, except for the last one, which I think might be wrong. I think it should be 6.9.

I don't know why the drops measured .72, then .54, then .72, etc. Maybe it's because none of your drops is exactly 5% -- they have been rounded to the nearest 10th of a mg, which is fine.

[Sheila]

You're doing an incredible job, gD. Clearly, that trip to town was not really helpful to you, but goodness knows, we have to do what we have to do during this long, long recovery.

That is so great that you are doing breathing exercises every hour. Very disciplined! I'm sure they are going to help you -- in the long run if not immediately. You are training your brain and whole body to relax. You are putting your attention on something intentionally. That strengthens the anterior cingulate part of your brain. This will strengthen your ability to direct your attention -- which is one of the things that gets damaged by this drug.

It will pay off in spades. And, even in the short run, you are choosing to do something kind for yourself, which has a big ripple effect through your psyche.

<-- breathing exercises!

[stan]

hello Grandmad,

i also had everything you live, first goal:reach slowly 0mg, second goal: wait time pass and improvements

[grandmaD]

. You are putting your attention on something intentionally. That strengthens the anterior cingulate part of your brain. This will strengthen your ability to direct your attention -- which is one of the things that gets damaged by this drug.

It will pay off in spades. And, even in the short run, you are choosing to do something kind for yourself, which has a big ripple effect through your psyche.

<-- breathing exercises!

The reason I do it for distraction of how I feel! I didn't know it did all those things though! I guess I will keep it up then! I do it twice a day every day, even when I am not too bad.

[grandmaD]

All of these are approximately 5% drops, except for the last one, which I think might be wrong. I think it should be 6.9.
.

Wow. That would make a big difference. Might explain this last drop, too!
I have decided anyway, to go 2.5% next taper, just for experiement to see if it alleviates the intensity of the symptoms.
Today, I feel like I am back in the land of the living. Beginning to realise the process a bit bitter now and I am determined to get off and now way allow these drug money makers take my life. It is very difficult, just the same when yo get so low;I can now look back and see my brain just does now work and darkness seems to take over during those weeks.

[Sheila]

Whenever I have a moment of clarity and determination like you're having right now, I really try to bookmark it for myself. I say -- remember this is the truth next time you are in the throes of distorted thinking and feeling!