4.5 years off Paxil/Seroxat and counting!

[alex]

W/D is a new experience for me, and I have being in it for only 7 months.

I have read the long and hard experience of Luc, and find it amazing.

But with all due respect, I have read of all his improvements, after all these years, yes, I read about his traveling around, I saw his photo, radiant with a glass of beer...and I´m happy for him.BUT I don´t understand how can he talk about feeling VERY sick again...!!

I can hardly sleep, eat, I can´t watch TV....can´t have sex....etc etc.I am VERY sick!! hardly surviving...

I KNOW I repeat, that I am in early W/D, but isn´t it maybe that these "lingering" issues are a little obsessive???

I was treated with AD because a very very bad Anxious Depression, so I know how it is, and if I compare, this is awfull, but that was worse.

Maybe that is something good for me, knowing that there is / was something worse.

I am sorry, if I hurt somebody´s feelings.I´m just trying to survive here.

[Claudius]

W/D is a new experience for me, and I have being in it for only 7 months.

I have read the long and hard experience of Luc, and find it amazing.

But with all due respect, I have read of all his improvements, after all these years, yes, I read about his traveling around, I saw his photo, radiant with a glass of beer...and I´m happy for him.BUT I don´t understand how can he talk about feeling VERY sick again...!!

I can hardly sleep, eat, I can´t watch TV....can´t have sex....etc etc.I am VERY sick!! hardly surviving...

I KNOW I repeat, that I am in early W/D, but isn´t it maybe that these "lingering" issues are a little obsessive???

I was treated with AD because a very very bad Anxious Depression, so I know how it is, and if I compare, this is awfull, but that was worse.

Maybe that is something good for me, knowing that there is / was something worse.

I am sorry, if I hurt somebody´s feelings.I´m just trying to survive here.

I guess you are referring here to me and not to Luc, because somewhere earlier in this thread I posted a picture of myself with a glass of beer during a short weekend trip. I also mentioned that I do not look like being sick and do not feel extremely anxious so I am able to travel and even enjoy a good meal or drink.
But that does nog mean that I am fully healed or do not have waves anymore! In that picture I was already more than 3 years in WD and doing significantly better than the first 2 years whixh were a living hell.
Because you are only 9 months in WD, I immedately do believe that you feel like crap now and cannot imagine to travel or feel a bit more normal. But that does not mean that you won't get better.

[alex]

Thank you Claudius; yes I meant you.

I´m sorry for my mistake, It´s just that I aM feeling so bad...

I am happy for you, really; it is incredible what you have been trhough.

I read sleep was I main issue in your early W/D. I have the same problem and I am scared.If I don´t sleep I´m done.

I have being handling it for the last month, but yesterday, because of a bad wave I had a set-back.

I had being able to reduce benzo, but last nite, I had to take it again.

I´m trying not to get very frustrated.

Claudius, tell me about you sleeping problems, and how they have improved over time, I would be helpul for me.

Sorry again and thank you.

AVE CAESAR!

[alex]

Uhh I realize too well that I do not look like an ill or debilltated person. And I have still a social life and can enjoy food and a good beer, but that does surely not mean that WD is over now... the picture is from one year ago and progression is still incredibly slow. Maybe I should remove the picture because it does not attribute to convince people that I am stil really sick.

I didn´t read this before Claudius; now it makes perfect sense to me.I´m sorry if I rushed my opinions.

You are all my heroes.

[Iggy131313]

Claudious, hows about an update, I see you lurking all the time!! you naughty little lurker you!

[Claudius]

Iggy tou are right, I still lurk here almost every day :)
But I will give you an update. Now at 5.5 years, I am still not out of the woods but taking it day by day, step by step. Right now I have something of a wave, feel pretty exhausted by WD, some anxiety is back and energy is low. But I have had much better days so I still feel like being in the waves-windows pattern.
And looking at it on a macro scale: each year has definately been BETTER than the previous one. My forst 2 years in WD, 2008-2009, were very horrific, with onyl a first window in mid 2009. Real recovery started, very VERY slowly in 2010, still having huge waves. In 2011 I could do much more and embared in some larger progamming projects. In 2012, I have even larger projects, worked more hours and had my first 50% job, ending last February.
Now busy with another project and a new programming course, still hindered by residual WD issues which are still a real bitch sometimes, but I still feel that recovery is going on.
I am definaterly among the worst cases of protracted WD and I have some peace now in realizing I will probably need the full 7 years Charly Groenedijk told me about. We will definately beat this crap.

[Sheila]

Thanks for the update, Claudius. I am so glad you are doing a new project and a new course. And I am so glad that you can feel the recovery going on, despite how damn long it is taking.

Sending healing energy!

[Iggy131313]

claudious, was it seroxat (brand name) that you were on?

[Luc]

And looking at it on a macro scale: each year has definately been BETTER than the previous one.

That is very true. In most of the cases, it's like this no doubt.

[Iggy131313]

Im so pleased that your recovery is progressing, your doing such a great job and being so brave, I wish I was as brave as you