Cycling Away from Chronic Illness...

[Luc]

Good to hear from you, Mike. More synchros will be coming your way for sure. Also, it's *so* important he knows about your illness. It'll be helpful, too.

[Mike]

i have in one hand improvements(i was very bad since years), but have very hard pains, after researching, seems fibromyalgia, it is heavy sudden chest sternum pains during 2/3 hours(i would call emergency for heart attack) and then just a little pain, and in all muscles the same; it comes in upper legs and hip joints, and goes away; but it is very hard brut pain(i was thinking to have to take opiate for) but it goes away, as i am writing i have hips pains, when i go outdoor, sternum hyper pain and after a hour, i am very better, and itching, itching

Sorry it's going so slow, Stan. I've had odd and pains from time to time too. Not nearly as bad or as frequent as yours but I understand how frustrating it is. Keep the faith. Time and good self care is really all we can do in my opinion. We've seen healing in others for many years so hopefully the same can happen for us.

[Mike]

Good to hear from you, Mike. More synchros will be coming your way for sure. Also, it's *so* important he knows about your illness. It'll be helpful, too.

Thanks for the reassurance on this point, Luc. The whole thought of the bike trip is stressful but maybe with a little luck something good will come out of it.

[Sheila]

I agree with Stan and Luc. I think you should take all of this as a sign from the universe and pursue it. I also think it’s really good that you started telling him a bit about your illness, and I encourage you to be completely open with him. Remember – his first meeting with you was when you were at a very low point, and he still has sought you out again.

Imagine how healing it would be for you on a hundred different levels to go on a bike tour with someone you could be really frank about your illness with. The two of you could even pre-plan a bit how to handle it if you need to stop riding for a day, that kind of thing.

I think you and I are both trying to listen for and accept transpersonal guidance more. I'm finding things go easier if I do this.

[stan]

Mike,

when you were gone for a trip with your bike in the past, had you a phone whith you?

[Mike]

I agree with Stan and Luc. I think you should take all of this as a sign from the universe and pursue it. I also think it’s really good that you started telling him a bit about your illness, and I encourage you to be completely open with him. Remember – his first meeting with you was when you were at a very low point, and he still has sought you out again.

If my health cooperates in even a minor way I will. i agree with what you are saying but hope you can also understand that sometimes the symptoms are so severe that it would be bad judgment to go. It's not like it's anxiety where I can habituate to the sensations and then feel relief and mastery over the situation. It's not that my predictions about what it would be like to be out there are distorted and by simply pushing myself to go I'll see that things aren't so bad. It's hardcore neuro stuff, confusion, DR, etc for hours, terrible insomnia trying to sleep in a tent, and all sorts of other stressors e.g, mechanical failures, finding places to camp, traffic, health issues, feeding myself, hygiene, other safety issues, etc. just trying to give you a sense of some of the challenges.

Imagine how healing it would be for you on a hundred different levels to go on a bike tour with someone you could be really frank about your illness with. The two of you could even pre-plan a bit how to handle it if you need to stop riding for a day, that kind of thing.

I agree 100%. If I do go I'll probably just plan on one day. That takes a lot of the pressure off. If I do feel even so so minus the next day I could opt for another day.

I think you and I are both trying to listen for and accept transpersonal guidance more. I'm finding things go easier if I do this.

I am certainly the most open to it that I've ever been. Glad to hear you are connecting more with this type of guidance and that i's made things easier.

[Mike]

Mike,

when you were gone for a trip with your bike in the past, had you a phone whith you?

Yes, I usually bring a phone for emergencies and to check in at home every day or two.

[Sheila]

I don’t think your worries are imaginary. I just still think it’s better to go for it, have problems, come home, than to not go for it. :) Anita Moorjani said something along these lines – while living with chronic, severe illness, just try to do what you would like to do with your life anyway, to the best of your ability.

There’s also this weird paradox with this illness, where it prevents you from doing things, but it also leads you *to* things you would never have gotten to any other way.

[Sheila]

Maybe you can work with this new friend on both of you not putting any performance pressure on you? The goal being the relationship and a shared pleasure, not any kind of performance?

[Mike]

I don’t think your worries are imaginary. I just still think it’s better to go for it, have problems, come home, than to not go for it. :) Anita Moorjani said something along these lines – while living with chronic, severe illness, just try to do what you would like to do with your life anyway, to the best of your ability.

There’s also this weird paradox with this illness, where it prevents you from doing things, but it also leads you *to* things you would never have gotten to any other way.

I don't think that you think that my concerns are imaginary. I just think that the mental status stuff is foreign to you and you're not understanding the seriousness of it. Literally every time I went on trips last year I questioned whether I should be out there. The first 45 minutes of my route is through the glass strewn (flat tires) inner city. I've had people yell at me, flip me off, aggressively ask me if I want to "party." There will be times when I am riding with cars 4-5 feet away from me at high rates of speed. Not to mention all of the concerns I brought up in my post above. Simply coming home if things get rough isn't always so easy especially when there is a 100+ mile return trip, mechanical problems, severe symptoms, etc. There are times to take calculated risks and there are times to be safe. I am hoping that I have lots of opportunities for the former this summer.