Samsara's AD WD Journey

[Luc]

Dear Samsara, you're such a brave soul. I really mean it. I'm absolutely sure your tooth will be getting better, and that it will heal. Only those in WD are able to fully comprehend the horror of going through all that you've described when CNS is still suffering so much. But it will be geting better, the Super Brave Samasara!!! We're all rooting for you, we're thinking of you, sending your way the Best Energies There Are 24/7. Please, stay brave!!!! {{{HUGS}}}}

Sending you this cute animal -----> I saw it in Stan's post and it's awesome.

[Barbara]

Samsara,

It has been a very difficult time for you. I’m so glad to here your mental confusion in much less intense. You did great requesting a change in your doctor when you were having such a difficult time. It sounds like his staff was also very supportive. Thanks for your updates and it is a relief to here you are managing despite the very difficult challenge. I’m continuing sending you energy to heal.

[Samsara]

Thank you so much everyone! I truly appreciate your supportive posts!

I'm still pretty shaken up and having bursts of traumatic meltdowns but I am feeling better physically although not completely out of the woods. I'm still experiencing physical "after shocks" sort of deal where I am dealing with CNS spasms.....mild anxiety surges that come out from nowhere and the uncontrollable jaw chattering effect and unrelenting eye twitches (only in right eye) but these are laughable compared to the violent proportions I had experienced and I'm not experiencing a whole host of other severe symptoms. So, things have substantially improved.

Junior, to answer your question re: antibiotics. I took a 2 week course of AB in December and I was mostly okay with it and I wouldn't feel terrified to take a ONE week course this time around IF I hadn't gone through these recent violent episodes. My CNS is still shaken up but is settling down a lot but I'm afraid that these recents attacks have shaken up my CNS too badly and that it will now become more sensitive to the AB. I feel as if I should be giving my CNS a good solid week to calm down a bit more before introducing anything into my system.

I was suppose to start the AB yesterday but I knew that my CNS was still too rattled to introduce the drug but I can't put off taking the AB for another day since, I will then risk jeopardizing the success rate of this last root canal treatment yesterday. Anyway, I took my first dose of AB just one hour ago and will have to take the second dose at 12:00 midnight. I pray that I my CNS will tolerate it as well as it did in Dec.

For the purposes of clarification (BTW, I realize my earlier posts were ambiguous in nature) these recent violent attacks were caused by Advil (Ibuprofen) NSAID. Despite NOT taking Advil every day nor repeatedly each day I believe the "half-life's" started to accumulate in my system and there is no doubt in my mind that I had experienced a severe adverse drug reaction due to this accumulation. My CNS got highjacked to extreme proportions and didn't come back down until half of life of the advil washed out of my system.

If memory serves me correctly, I believe it takes about 5 or 6 half-lifes for a drug to completely wash out of one's system. So, I still have some half-lifes of Advil lurking in my bloodstream and this is why I am so afraid of introducing the antibiotic at this time. Although AB work much differently than NSAIDS, any new drug introduced into my system at at time when it is still fragile may set off bad CNS reactions again.

I will post much more detailed information about all this as soon as I can detraumatize myself and feel safe with the AB treatment. I can't talk about the details nor share further info. on what I have come to discover since, it will shoot me into trauma states too easily. I hope to construct a very detailed post with supporting research once I feel well enough. There are many things that I have discovered that I feel are very important to share with those going through WD.

I just have to ride out this week of AB and hope that I will be okay to finish the full course of the prescription. I NEED to have this root canal issue solved once and for all. If this fails, I will have to get the tooth extracted (as you mentioned Junior in your earlier post to me). You are absolutely right...........at some point heroic measures to save a tooth become too ridiculous to continue.

BTW, I am presently not feeling too generous towards the dentist who has caused me so many problems. Now that my mind is clearing a bit, it's obvious to me that he has made FOUR critical errors. ONE error is forgivable and understandable but the other three are not since, they are STANDARD practices of care that he SHOULD be aware of. For now, I will suppress my anger since, if I feed it ...I'll only land up stirring up my CNS and my psyche. I do plan on pursuing this at a future date perhaps with a formal letter since, his SLOPPY and incompetent workmanship is unacceptable. Yes, he's a very nice guy in many ways but I can't excuse his unbelievable lack of skill and basic knowledge.

Anyway, I better stop talking about him.

Thanks so much again everyone for your wonderful supportive posts and the adorable comforting emoticons.

Forgive any repeats within this post. My mind is still kind of disorganized and my thoughts circling which makes it difficult for me to present things in a more organized fashion.

Please continue to keep sending good energy and keep pulling for me to tolerate the antibiotic well. BTW, my next dentist app't isn't until March 01 but that's providing that the infection clears up and stays cleared and no other complications hinder the process.

I think I will try to go into another thread for a few minutes so I can distract in a positive manner. I NEED to get some humour hormones circulating (lol) to off-set trauma. I need to create a dopamine hit to jolt my mind out of trauma modes. :)


Samsara

[Samsara]

sorry but I have to purge one angry thought. To date I have spent $625.00 on this ONE tooth (which I can ill afford at this time) and it will cost another $1,000.00 for a crown to protect this tooth so, I feel quite justified being angry for the dentist's failure to follow BASIC common sense procedures. This doesn't count the cost of my two AB prescriptions nor the OTC advil nor does it cover my last dental app't which I have no idea what will cost since, they were kind enough to postpone the charge until my next app't.

Oops............I better stop now.....since, I can feel my CNS reactions arising.

BTW, although we have universal health care in Canada, it does not cover dental, eye exams, prescriptions glasses, prescriptions drugs and it only covers a small percentage of chiropractic care. Unless one is employed with a company or government that offers extended health insurance benefits, one must pay out of pocket for all these additional health care costs.

[stan]

our health system in France seems the same,
and we need much money to live, and for that to work, and to work we need to not be in withdrawal...
or we will be without teeth, glasses

[Samsara]

our health system in France seems the same,
and we need much money to live, and for that to work, and to work we need to not be in withdrawal...
or we will be without teeth, glasses

Yes, you are so right Stan. Sorry to hear that you have a similar system in France. Despite the many imperfections with our health care system, I am still beyond grateful to have access to far more than what other people have access to in other countries. IMHO, it's INHUMANE for any wealthy country to deprive it's citizens of basic health care. Yes, we pay more taxes in Canada (and you likely do in France as well) in order to provide universal health care but it's worth it.

I have always felt this strongly about the subject even when I was working full time (government job) with the best extended health care benefits one could hope for. It just broke my heart to know that I live in a country where those who are low incomes must get their teeth extracted rather than restored. I could go on about this subject in detail but the bottom line is: it's unacceptable for such inequities to exist and it doesn't have to exist IF people would just get out of their "selfish modes" and be willing to pay more taxes.

Let me tell you, when I worked for the government............I never met so many truly ungrateful people who reeked this sense of ENTITLEMENT and would constantly denigrate people on social assistance. I'm sorry but I couldn't remain silent and would always counteract their ignorant, uninformed assumptions about those who must live in poverty.


Then we had this wonderful Provincial Premier who decided to campaign against those on welfare. I couldn't believe it and the most shocking thing of all is that he WON the election. He went on to cut welfare payments considerably as well as Mental Health Services and still more than 10 years later, social assistant recipients still have not had their "original" monthly payments restored. It's truly sickening to witness how eager the public was to support this inhumane politician. Goes to show just where the average person stands on a lot of social issues.


I plan on getting back into social activism work once I fully recover and once I am working again since, it's not okay for me to get back into a comfortable income and lifestyle and ignore those who do not have similar opportunities to restore their lives.

Oh, my wording and sentence structure is really atrocious ATM (lol) but I will let it go since, I have to get some food into me ASAP.

[Sheila]

You're really doing an excellent job of mastering this terribly challenging situation! And you're really being compassionate and loving to yourself, which is so fantastic to see! I hope you feel really proud of yourself and somewhat more secure for discovering how very strong and knowledgeable and capable you are, even under awful conditions.

I have been continuing to ask the Universe to get some support and help and relief over to you ASAP! Especially asking that the antibiotic bring you only benefits.

[Samsara]

So sorry to hear of this hard time you are having Samsara. Tooth pain is the pits. I've had a couple of root canals and I will always remember the pain I suffered before having the first one. Four Mersyndol didn't touch it and I ended up having to go home from work. What made it worse was that I had to catch a train and suffer the pain all the way home! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....

I know you said you didn't want the tooth removed because it's your last molar, but I think you need to ask yourself if the pain and all the associated CNS issues you are having right now is worth it?

Wishing you all the good luck and vibes that you both need and deserve. Also sendings loads of healing energy.

Thank you so much for your support and sympathies Junior. Wow re: your brutal experience. So sorry you went through that experience and that the NSAID and codeine combo did not provide with any relief.

I recently found out that pain meds are not always able to provide relief since, the infection will prevent such drugs from working. Antibiotics must be utilized to get the bacteria to settle down enough so that the pain relievers will work. I know that dental anesthetic usually will not work until antibiotics start taking effect. A lot of good that does us when we are in the most extreme stages of pain. (lol)


Samsara

[Samsara]

I’m sending positive, healing, protective energy right away. And I’m asking the Universe and all the forces of humanism and mercy to give you help right away.

Remember, you are never alone. We, your friends here at IAWP, are *always* connected to you through the ether now. And you are connected to others who care about you from your past, present, and future – all the time.

You are doing such an excellent job of coping! You’re really covering all the bases, and being diligently self-caring. You’re thought of excellent coping techniques in the middle of terror and agony.

I’m so sorry! Teeth are so unpleasant to deal with at the best of times, and in w/d, just that much more threatening.

But, you will definitely be OK. You are not in danger of anything terrible. I know you know that. But *I* need to hear that over and over from others, so maybe it helps for you to hear it….

I think it’s extremely likely that your regular dentist and a course of antibiotics will fix this up very quickly.

Try to post again to help yourself feel a little more connected to help and caring.

What about avoiding lying down for now? And temporarily resting in a different place? Sitting propped up, reclining (this is how I have had to sleep for years for sinus reasons) in a chair or sofa?

Do you have an acupuncturist you know? Only if you already know someone, it might work to have a session to calm the system.

Does it help to move your body? Walking through the house? Ground out the pain and excess energy, through your feet into the Earth. Does it help to listen to music, watch a movie to distract, get a mini-break?

I know it feels like Hell and like it will never end. I have been in that state myself countless times. *It always ends.* We are very lucky to have something that everyone recovers from. It’s completely awful, and completely unfair, but it does end, and then you are going to feel great!

Wow! Thank you so much for such a beautiful post Sheila! Thank you also for the kind compliments and sincere energy being sent my way as well as the wonderful suggestions.

I did have to implement what your recommended re: laying with head propped up but that wasn't until the morning. I was awake for two nights and unfortunately I wasn't able to distract via TV or anything else since, the anxiety, akathisia, over sensitization were too extreme however, your suggestions re: moving around is what I had to do. I had to keep pacing, along with going up and down the stairs to burn off the adrenaline and there was so much organic fear and terror that it was impossible to sit still or lay down. Had it been day light I would have went outside and walked despite feeling very paranoid but I was too fearful to walk down the street in the darkness of the night.

BTW, I'm still not able to watch a much TV or read etc. even on my okish days. I hope this will improve in the coming months.

As for acupuncture ..........I'm not comfortable implementing such at this time. I seem to be too sensitive and I fear that it may make things worse for me IF I go to someone who is ill informed about WD or unskilled as the dentist was.

Ground out the pain and excess energy, through your feet into the Earth.

I like what you wrote here to describe what we must do when in steeped in extreme anxiety states. So true, we must "ground out the pain" and having our feet making contact with the ground/earth does give some sort of anchoring effect even though we must keep moving.

Cosette, Barbara, Luc and Stan thank you also for your very kind posts of support. I sincerely appreciate it!

BTW, Sheila, no pressure whatsoever to respond to this post. I'm trying to be respectful of your time and energy ..so I'm just sharing some details which really don't require any feedback unless of course you feel there is something that you wish to share/add.

Samsara

[Samsara]

You're really doing an excellent job of mastering this terribly challenging situation! And you're really being compassionate and loving to yourself, which is so fantastic to see! I hope you feel really proud of yourself and somewhat more secure for discovering how very strong and knowledgeable and capable you are, even under awful conditions.

I have been continuing to ask the Universe to get some support and help and relief over to you ASAP! Especially asking that the antibiotic bring you only benefits.

Thank you for your very supportive post Sheila and for sending continued healing energy etc.

Please forgive my previous post to you. I now realize that you were offering suggestions for pain management and last night my mind got lost while constructing my post and thus, wrote about my "attacks" and how I was not able to implement certain things.

I had to stay on-line all evening to keep the feelings of trauma at bay (as much as possible) but it's obvious by my posts that my mind was not processing things correctly, not to mention lapsed into circular pattern type thinking. I

Samsara