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I thought I'd write a little more about my psych med history to give everyone more of a background. I was prescribed Cymbalta during a very stressful period of my life in 2006. The stress I was experiencing was causing me to exhibit some signs of clinical depression. I stayed on Cymbalta for a little over 1 year and tapered quickly per my doctor's instructions (don't remember the specifics). Was fine for 4 months or so but then more stress occurred and I immediately experienced extreme anxiety/fear (especially in the mornings) difficulty sleeping, lack of appetite, etc. I now recognize this as withdrawal but then thought I was just "going crazy" so tried to go back on an AD - everything I tried made my symptoms much worse so eventually my provider put me on Klonopin and Zoloft. The combination worked to get the AD in my system and to calm down. After 4 months I tried to taper the Klonopin and experienced withdrawal - I suddenly put it together that what I had experienced in the prior months was also withdrawal. I slowly tapered off Klonopin and remained on 100 mg Zoloft. I eventually wanted to taper the Zoloft because of weight gain, low libido, and just an overall feeling of being unmotivated in life (but this might just be me, not sure). I tried several times to do a slow taper but never was able to get off of it. Eventually I tried a 5% taper and was doing ok until last spring I went through a stressful time and once again experienced full-on withdrawal symptoms during my taper- I tried to go back up which had always worked in the past but to no avail. I was in a very bad place - not sleeping or eating, suicidal thoughts, my body would just never calm down despite not sleeping - so went back on Klonopin 1 mg which helped and decided to switch the AD from Zoloft to Celexa. I switched fairly slowly over a 6 month time period and felt really good during this time - almost like myself before AD use. I finished the Zoloft in January. Mid-March I tried to taper a small amount of the Klonopin and immediately had terrible anxiety so went back up again. Then towards end of March/beginning of April, I was having more anxiety/depression so my provider and I thought maybe I needed more Celexa to help with these symptoms and to help with the Klonopin taper so I went up on the Celexa. Once I hit 30 mg, I started having a daily constant headache. I went up to 35 mg in the hopes that it might help with the headache (my sister had had an experience with Celexa where she had a headache but not at higher doses). Unfortunately the headache has remained plus I’ve anxiety and mostly depression - anhedonia and pervasive suicidal thoughts. I’ve lost a lot of weight as well as my appetite has diminished a lot. So basically I am not feeling well and on a high dose of Celexa. :(
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