ok so a few nights ago when I had that good evening at the pub, was it a window? or just the natural feeling better in the evenings? what I really want to know is if others, Luc, Sheila, Squirrel, were you able to have reletavly enjoyable evenings like that after a year of suffering? Is it a good sign or just the noram for an extreme case such as I?
Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this
Well, in all honesty, Iggy, I do not quite know what "enjoyable" word means even today at more than 4.5 years off. I wish I *was* able to leave my flat these days in the first place (too much of agoraphobia, sensory over-stimulation, plus severe intolerance of any physical exertion going on). But it's still better than it used to be. Paradoxically, in this hell of hells then, I still went to work... For more than 4 years... I had no other choice (for many reasons) but to do it... I'm not able to even describe it, nor will I ever be. At one year off, and still much further on, I was in a constant hell of hells, wasn't able to sleep at all (vomitting, tremors, cramps, acidic akathisia, OCD, ruminations and paranoic thoughts 24/7 so severe I was begging to die every single second, hellish akathisia, non-ending panic attacks... And dozens of tens more...)
It needs to be remembered though I was a poly-drug long-term poly-cold turkey after going through the hell of multiple switches between drugs/upping the dose, SSRIs/antipsychotics/benzo, so, in my case the improvement is very very slow. In most cases, it keeps improving much much faster. I'm writing this all to show that, despite such an unimaginable torture, the improvement is still there and it keeps improving.
Last edited by Luc; 06-24-2013 at 11:23 AM.
Keep walking. Just keep walking.
so the fact I was able to watch a loud band, jiggle about with Freddie, smile and talk to people, not be over stimulated, is a good sign? even if it was just for the evening befroe everything got hell beyond hell again the next day?
people who didnt know there was anything wrong wouldnt have known how sick I was, obviously I was still having some minor symptoms but not in hell, not at all, the hell came back in the morning, the very same hell you describe, so its s good sign yes?
Luc, im so so sorry for your suffering, just so sorry, and relate to you conpletely, only someone who has lived this hell could possibly understand
Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this
Luc I didnt know you were put on antipsychotocs? what did they give you the BASTARDS, I HATE THEM
Put on citalopram July 2009 during a physical illness - didnt need it. 40mg
went down to 20mg July 2010 CT in Jan 2012 - 2.5 years on.
Tried to restart July 2012 due to 1 panic attack (never had one before - start of CT W/D) - adverse reaction
Down to 1.5mg from the failed RI
Now at 0.48 and trying to stabalize - been 6 weeks
now have SEVERE anxiety, akathsia, feel like Im on acid 24/7 depression, D/P, signed off work. Scared of everything..please God let me heal from this
withdrawal is hell for many, many cannot do what you are doing, suffering more; each thinks he is the worst case, i think i am a acute case, but reading Christiana, Mike, Luc, Sheila, yearakathisia, claudius, Jackson, the swedish of PP i forget name and many others, i see we all suffer and suffered hell; it is a long period to pass; we speak not about weeks, but months if not years;
some short termer heal more faster, it is a fact; and long termer , i am in; we have to do what all these people have done: survive; and it is rare they give up(often when moving a high dose) and after years, many are able to live with residuals; so this is my goal
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
It means that your system is re-wiring itself. Through such waves and windows it is heading towards recovery.Originally Posted by Iggy131313
Keep walking. Just keep walking.
YES,YES, IT IS A GOOD SIGN!!
It hapened to me the other night..I went to a party, and I was feeling bad, but at some moment, I was able to enjoy and be part of the world again...! I ended up singing, and the people liked so much, and I felt so good for this achievement!
Our resilient bodies are struggling to heal, but the emotional part is very important, your friend Dr.Healy talks about this: "it is important to recover to be mentally and socially active as much as you can be""don`t withdraw from the world...
Of course the pub experience is a good sign! don't let your mind boicot your process.
150mgs Effexor for 4 years 2008-2012 for situational Major Depression. No AD before
Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months / last dose July 26th/2012 aprox.
Acute W/D first 1-2 months
Protracted W/D since then and slowly recovering.
Main symptoms: Anxiety, Insomnia,Anhedonia.
April 9th- 20th SEVERE DEPRESSION.
11 months off.Slowly improving
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