My story (long sorry)

[Sheila]

OK, here are my thoughts on this mystery at this point. I’m very interested in the future of Omega-3 and w/d, so I really want to understand this. –

-- You are in very early w/d from *three* psych meds. All of your symptoms may just be due to this.

-- You are very sensitive to reproductive hormone changes and meds.

-- Part of what you’re describing sounds like w/d interacting with your menstrual cycle. I had mild-moderate PMS before w/d. But, in w/d, PMS became a misery and interacted with w/d.

-- Maybe 700 mg Omega-3 from pill per day is too much for you to start on. Yet, you say you are eating 2,600 mg from fish a few times a week???

-- Are you eating the pill oil without the casing?

-- Omega-3 *should* be good for stabilizing your hormones. But, the fact that it’s good for PMS and PND and estrogen dominance shows that it is effective. Therefore, it could mean that the dose you’re taking is having too much of an effect too fast for you.

-- Given that your menstrual cycle seems to be part of the picture, it might be worth staying on your current Omega dose for another two weeks and seeing if you are better when you are in a different part of your cycle. But, I am *totally* OK with you deciding to stop it now.

-- Another option is for you to go down to a lower dose of Omega and updose more slowly. Remember, when I was in earlier w/d, I was cautious and went up on my Omega using pills that only had 200 mg. I had no problem. Now, we can’t know if I could have tolerated a higher dose anyway. But, this is an option for you now or in the future.

-- I really believe you will able to reap the benefits of Omega-3, but you may need to start slower or wait a bit. And you may need less of it to get a benefit than, say, I do.

-- BTW – I never felt like two people until w/d and then I did, big time. Very weird experience.

[hermi]

You seemed to have summed it up well.
Hormones are a major factor in my mood, even before I was on meds. I would get moderate PMT in the week running up to my period and it would get better a few days after starting it. My cycles are fairly irregular, the only thing that is regular is the fact they are 5-6 weeks long and not the usual 4...one reason why I hated being on the pill, the bleeding part came around far too soon to what I'm used to! I would rather let my body do what it wants to do it can never be good to force a change. The PMT has definitely been worse over the last few months since stopping the sertraline.
I am still taking the omega-3 without the casing at the same time every evening.
I wonder whether to continue it for a couple more weeks? Maybe if I stop it and I feel better I won't know if its due to no longer taking the omega-3 or if it would have got better on its own anyway.
I think I might continue for a couple more weeks and see what happens. If things start to get much more worse or continue without a sign of getting easier then I will stop it for a couple of months.
The only thing I'm slightly worried about is the level of anger I'm experiencing. I've come very close to kicking the dog today for tripping me up, in fact if he hadn't have moved quick enough I would've landed a heavy kick to his tummy....something I have NEVER done before to an animal or person or wish to do again. This bothers me a lot that I am showing signs of not being able to control myself physically. I hope this was just a one off moment of anger. I'm normally a very laid back easy going person. Not a lot has ever stressed me in the past...it normally takes A LOT, now its just the slightest thing and my stress level soar instantly.
Irritability and tiredness doesn't help I suppose.
Please don't think I'm an awful person...I'm not normally a violent person, this is so NOT me at the moment

[PAROX2010]

Hello Hermi:

Anger is very common in WD.
I'm not a violent person, but sometimes I have violent thoughts (GRRRR, lol). And this made ​​me feel bad.
wd cause:
Irritability. The person feels irritated, impatient, violent outbursts may have difficulty controlling him, or respond poorly to their loved ones, with reviews and intolerance.
It's not your fault.
The solution?. Maybe retire,relaxation, breathe deeply and engage the mind counting numbers from 1 to 10 ....

Take care, and a hug

[m&m]

It's absolutely awful how w/d can make a person feel. Try not to beat yourself up too bad b/c of it. This is not you. The anger will get better. Parox has a good idea regarding the rest and meditation.

[Sheila]

I think most of us have gotten violent or nearly violent several times during this ordeal. Have you tried exercise or pounding pillows or shouting into pillows? It would be great if you could get outdoors, too, when you feel that way. Put the kids in a stroller and go running?

[Luc]

Those emotions are NOT "real you", Hermi. They are WD. Do not blame yourself for anything.

[hermi]

Thank you everyone for the reassurance.It makes a change to be in contact with people who really understand what is going on.

Yes Parox2010, Irritability is a major thing...its the irritability that comes forst then the anger and lashing out, verbally and in this instance physically.

Luc, thank you...in part I DO blame myself. Not for the w/d situtaion and whats going on now. I blame myself for not listening to myself when I KNEW within that first week of taking the sertraline that what I was experiencing was side effects NOT postnatal depression second time around. The stupid side of me listened to my G.P. because I had postnatal depression with my first baby along with hallucinations, hearing things, and nightmares and I was scared I would go back to that place without the meds. Now I am somewhere much worse. So in part yes I do blame myself because I know about side effects of medicines with my job, I knew this was what I was going through but I let other people convince me otherwise because I was feeling so ill and vulnerable. I've been in hell ever since.

Sheila,
Yes I do get out when I can. At the time of night it was though it was the boys bedtime so I needed to concentrate on that. A punch bag would also be a good idea. I remember punching cushions for about 10 minutes when BC was a few months old. He cried non stop from the moment he was born and slept very little. After a whole night then whole day of inconsolable crying, I was exhausted and frustrated and it was the cushions or the baby that was getting it. Thankfully my arms chose the cushions! Mind you the whole display entertained BC for a while, it was the only part of the day he stopped crying! I did feel better after though. Maybe I should make a habit of it whilst I'm feeling so bad (hitting cushions I mean!)! So when I say that I haven't been violent towards people before its true in that whenever I've felt that way I've channelled it elsewhere. There has only been one other incident during the change over from sertraline to mirtazipine that I'm not posting about on here, and that again wasn't really me...its another incident along with everything else that finally clicked in my head that it was time to come off the meds. The normal me wouldn't do it.

Thanks again for every one being so nice. I feel a teeny bit better today. Less irritable but still weepy. I had really vivid dreams last night. I was being stalked by a lion...its always lions when I'm being chased or followed and there's always lots of other people trying to avoid the lion too... sometimes I see the lions and they get really close but I never get eaten or anything. Its weird! I dreamt loads about being chased by lions when I was expecting BC.

[Sheila]

Good job, hermi! Pillows are fine. But maybe a real punching bag hung up would be fun! I always wanted one of those!

[hermi]

I used to have one in my last house, we got rid of it when we moved because we have nowhere to hang it up. My hubby used to use it a lot outside, and when he was really wound up he used to take a bat to it. I didn't like that I thought it seemed too aggressive...the neighbours used to think he was nuts! I'm not surprised! When I thought no one was looking one day I did the same...I understood then the satisfaction of using a bat on it - I never said a word to him after that about doing it! He was in a very stressful job at the time.

[Sheila]

Well, it’s disturbing sometimes to face how much aggression or anger we all have the potential for! But, we just do, and we all have to figure out what to do about it.

Do you get any outlet for aggression in your work? I wonder if that would be more satisfying for you. You know what I mean? Like trial lawyers and police officers and political activists are all different forms of people who get to fight on a daily basis, and some people really *thrive* on that.