7 Months - No Improvement and new symptoms

[Needinghelp]

Well, here i am, 7 months off meds and still feel as bad as ever. No improvement. Actually got some more symptoms and symptoms that are worse.
Head pressure much worse, tinnitus is now constant and very loud, i struggle to fall asleep. I have nightmares now and it takes me a while to realize im awake and not in the nightmare anymore. I have periods of extreme fatigue, my GI problems got better, but now back to worse. Heart palpitations much worse, Apathy worse.

I have this strange sympotm and im not sure what its called. My past memories keep popping up in my head constantly, especially things i have forgotten, it happens multiple times a day. When i have these memories, i have a feel of panic. What is this?

I see more and more people off years and not recovered. This is really discouraging. I dont ask myself if ill recover that much as Mike suggested, but its like i really doubt i will recover. Some people told me a few members who dissapeared are much better and recovered. But then i find out they are actually not. This is so discouraging and it makes me so sad to think of the situation im in.

The question is, do people really fully recover from this, or are they just lying to let others feel better? Is there any reason to believe i will recover?

[Luc]

I have this strange sympotm and im not sure what its called. My past memories keep popping up in my head constantly, especially things i have forgotten, it happens multiple times a day. When i have these memories, i have a feel of panic. What is this?

It's ruminations/obsessive thoughts/intrusive thougts/OCD - one of the most common symptoms in WD. They are *not* real you, they are caused by WD, and will be, gradually, getting better. Here's one of the threads on it;

http://antidepressantwithdrawal.info...ht=ruminations

That is not uncommon to not only experience worsening that far off (7 and more months off), but also hit the worst point of WD. It all depends on a given case. It does *not* mean you won't be improving. WD is probably the most absurd experience there is. Hardly anything is linear, all works more in cycles of worsening and improvement. The thing is that, sooner or later, the average mass of improvements is bigger than worsenings.

[Claudius]

NH, I am probably one of the extremely bad cases in terms of WD recovery. My first 20 months off were one living hell. THe first noticable improvement was not earlier than 19 months off. And even after that very nasty waves occurred which made me feel back at square one.
And, just like you, very nasty memories popping up again and again, and in my first 3-9 months off I even hallucinated almost non-stop about my former abuser, the scariest and meanest person I ever met in my life, now about 25 years ago.

But the good news: even I started to recover after about 2 years off, and now, 5,5 years off I feel a massive recovery though some nassty residual symptoms are still there.
This may sound discouraging but just accept the fact that it can take a couple of years for your nervous system to even come into a state of partial recovery, which it can use as a base for further recovery steps.
I still believe in 100% healing from this. And even myo mother notices that I am doing way better again than, say, one year ago. And it feels that way, too.
So do not give up. Losing 3-5 years of your life due to WD is flabbergasting but I now not consider it anymore as a complete loss, I leanred so many new things that I feel even glad I have this experience and new knowledge in my pocket and will be my own expert for the rest of my life instead of relying on well-paid pharma squibs.

[Mike]

Well, here i am, 7 months off meds and still feel as bad as ever. No improvement. Actually got some more symptoms and symptoms that are worse.
Head pressure much worse, tinnitus is now constant and very loud, i struggle to fall asleep. I have nightmares now and it takes me a while to realize im awake and not in the nightmare anymore. I have periods of extreme fatigue, my GI problems got better, but now back to worse. Heart palpitations much worse, Apathy worse.

I have this strange sympotm and im not sure what its called. My past memories keep popping up in my head constantly, especially things i have forgotten, it happens multiple times a day. When i have these memories, i have a feel of panic. What is this?

I see more and more people off years and not recovered. This is really discouraging. I dont ask myself if ill recover that much as Mike suggested, but its like i really doubt i will recover. Some people told me a few members who dissapeared are much better and recovered. But then i find out they are actually not. This is so discouraging and it makes me so sad to think of the situation im in.

The question is, do people really fully recover from this, or are they just lying to let others feel better? Is there any reason to believe i will recover?

I have had memories pop up like you describe. It's totally random and the memories span decades. I have no idea what it is probably just neurons misfiring or rewiring. It's hard to say...

Regarding people recovering there are whole lists of people at other websites who have fully recovered, had children, started new careers, etc.

[m&m]

NH, you are not alone. Those "past memories" happen to me as well. I never really noticed them before the reaction. I mean I'm sure I thought about things that had happened in the past but never experienced them at such magnitude with such negative emotion and hurt and fear behind it. When they first started it just feels like a never ending form of torture. It is better now.

As far as nightmares, wow, bless you. Those are hard too right? Uggg. When my nightmares started they were very demonic in nature and totally left me shaken. I would have to get the bible in the middle of the night and read and pray and sometimes even start singing "Sweetest Name I Know" to get through. They rarely happen now.

Oh, and the thing about taking a while to wake up (feeling like being trapped between two worlds) ... yes that's another one that has totally gone away.

My heart palpitations are better for sure!!!!

People do get better NH. Wished I could tell you something more uplifting, but that's I all I have... is that things will slowly get better because that is what I am experiencing. One day I hope to tell you I am 100% healed so to be an inspiration.

Don't give up on that miracle.

[Sheila]

I'm thoroughly convinced that people recover fully. I have read too many anecdotes.

Unfortunately, new symptoms can appear and old symptoms return. That's the nature of this beast. But, still you will recover fully.

The memory thing is very common. I, too, have had intense, vivid memories from my whole life -- some significant, and some like standing on a street corner -- why the heck is that still important?

It slowly abates as you heal. Some of it I think is memories returning that you may have lost during the use of the meds or the initial phase of w/d without realizing it. Some of it might be healing of trauma.

[alex]

NH, I am very close to you in time; I took my last dose 7 months and 15 days aprox.

Let me tell you this: I have EXACTLY the same ruminations and fears about not healing from this.

But you know what? I´M HEALING!! My anxiety levels are lower, anhedonia, better; my worst and most feared symptom, insomnia is getting slowly better...

NH, DON´T LET YOUR FEAR BLIND YOU.I also have fear and doubts; I am 59 yo, and I feel I have so much more to live, and in a better way than the life I had before.

You will heal, but you have to help yourself, to make it easier.

[dave 23]

If you had BBM blackberry I would give you a contact of someone who recovered in a few months from an SSRI wd. And like I told you, iv spoke with robert whitaker nd charly G, both insurred tht people do heal... You will too, as long as you stick to water, healthy diet, and no meds, you'll be fine! But try living your life, regardless of how you feel, go to the gym, talk with friends, no matter how the derealisation has worsen, distraction is your best friend. I'm sure your waves will lessen in their severity as time goes on.

Godbless.
Dave

[maisiemarie]

Hello, I am wondering if anyone has used alternative medicine to heal from ssri's? I was on Effexor for about eight years. I came on this forum before and Sheila and Luc were very sweet and helpful. I am so happy that you guys are here. I've gotten in contact with an acupuncturist and she seems to have a good line of supplements from Thorne Research. I just wondered if anyone had had luck with supplements to rebuild their nervous system and if they had luck. I also have ms, so it's been hard to sort out whats what. I hope it is possible to rebuild the nervous system and heal.

Sincerely,
Maia Marie

[Luc]

Maisiemarie, you may find some info/threads in Alternatives useful. We're regularly adding possible ways of treatment to it; http://antidepressantwithdrawal.info...ealing-Methods

Nervous system has amazing self-healing abilities, there's absolutely no doubt about it, those just need to be activated and helped. We are trying to figure out ways in which it could be done in a most effective way.