All my life (maybe because of my anxiety from childhood) i always had fear to be happy; fear to lose work, to have enough money to eat and so on...
Before being retired, i said myself "now i will live happy, i have money until death, no more need work"
and there: divorce, protracted withdrawal, ...
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww Stan. I know withdrawal makes life very hard but I believe that happiness is a choice. Did you ever read that book Songbird always recommended? Hope and help for your nerves by Claire Weekes. I stumbled on a copy a few years ago and it has helped me more than anything (before Paxil and during withdrawal). A lot of what she says is along the same lines as your ideas of acceptance. Might be worth looking into.
http://www.claireweekes.com.au/index.html
Aropax (Paxil). Currently at 13mg and holding.
Added Endep (amitrypline) 12.5 for sleep - 11 July 2013
"There are things that are known and things that are unknown; in between are doors." - Anonymous
Stan -- are you saying you are afraid you will be unhappy, or are you saying you are afraid you will be happy, or both?
Meds free since June 2005.
"An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
-- Holger Kalweit
i say i was afraid to be happy, that happiness was not for me but for others, if i was sad, it was better for me as happy; it is anxiety who made me so i think;
anxiety ruled my life
and today i want rule my life myself with my anxiety
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
http://www.claireweekes.com.au/index.html[/QUOTE]
i see but never bought this book; i bought many french books but they seem not helping me much; working alone on myself seems to give better results
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
This one is different Stan. I battled with GAD for 20 years - not knowing what it was - and NOTHING helped as much as that book. I was already on Paxil but the time I stumbled on it but it made more sense than anything I've ever read on anxiety. I highly recommend it.
Aropax (Paxil). Currently at 13mg and holding.
Added Endep (amitrypline) 12.5 for sleep - 11 July 2013
"There are things that are known and things that are unknown; in between are doors." - Anonymous
This seems like a HUGE insight. When did you realize this?Originally Posted by stan
Meds free since June 2005.
"An initiation into shamanic healing means a devaluation of all values, an overturning of the profane world, a peeling away of inveterate handed-down notions of the world, liberation from everything preconceived. For that reason, shamanism is closely connected with suffering. One must suffer the disintegration of one's own system of thought in order to perceive a new world in the higher space."
-- Holger Kalweit
Stan I am too convinced that happiness is not for me...I am suffering now like two years ago.I made a huge backwards step. I am crying most of the time and I live as if I had lost hope.I don't know what happens after 41 months off Paxil. Last summer I felt well and I could believe that I had healed.Now everything is to be re-built and I am afraid to have not strength enough...
Severe anxiety since childhood .SSRIs for OCD.
Major traumatism in my life:Prozac during short periods.
Deroxat (=Paxil) during 7 years.
Three unsuccessful atempts to quit.
Deroxat free since may 2008 (Cold turkey )
The symptoms come back, leave whole or in part, and hop, a day, they come back again, settle down, destroying the little that was rebuilt;
we suffer again like a dog, and it's hard to believe that they will leave, but they leave;
I heard that one day they do not come back ...
they are waves of hell, we are punished for i do not know for,
how long does last all this madness?
"just a few years..."
12 years paxil(9 years only 10 mg) - cold turkey(1,5 month) and switch celexa tapered 1 year 20 mg
62 years old - for GAD - 4 years 3 months meds free [since april 2009]
vegetables soup - orange (vit C) - curcuma - some meat or fish
Wow!!!It's time for us french people to be a little more positive, don't you think Stan?
Today seems to be better for me and I want to give you hope for the future.
Severe anxiety since childhood .SSRIs for OCD.
Major traumatism in my life:Prozac during short periods.
Deroxat (=Paxil) during 7 years.
Three unsuccessful atempts to quit.
Deroxat free since may 2008 (Cold turkey )
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