Update

[dave 23]

Well....

Here I am, two months and one week later.
Still in withdrawal.

There has been healing I suppose, as they say healing occures regardless of how symptomatic a person is. However I haven't observed any healing yet.

Derealization has me on my knees ALL DAY EVERYDAY, and infact it has raised in its severity.

Depersonalization; I practically feel like I make no sense when I talk to people, my responses appear to be odd at times and quite irrelevent. I question my judgement and how I respond in conversions, to validate if I'm not sounding like a complete lunatic.

Memory: this is by far my worst symptom as it made me see numerous neurologists fearing(agoraphobia) that I might be developing thiamine deficiency or wernicke's korsakoff sydrome, terrififed still that this might be the case, even more terrified that if it is the case then I'm permanently damaged. My recall is just THAT BAD!

Physical symtoms; I have little to no physical symptoms at all, no tinnitus, or any other physical symptom. Then again, I was never one to complain about any physical systoms to begin with.

I continue to hold on to the little faith I have left for healing or ever obtaining my mental abilities. But a part of me has came to accept what has happened, I have no expectations, if this is how its gonna feel like till death, then fine. Said too many prayers and had no response. Its in such experiences I'd see why a person would turn to rebuke the existence of a God and become athiest, however, I haven't done that. Still hanging on.

Acceptance makes it a little less harder, by a fragment.

On with the struggle, keep strong guys.

Dave.

[m&m]

There has been healing I suppose, as they say healing occures regardless of how symptomatic a person is. However I haven't observed any healing yet.

Derealization has me on my knees ALL DAY EVERYDAY, and infact it has raised in its severity.

Depersonalization; I practically feel like I make no sense when I talk to people, my responses appear to be odd at times and quite irrelevent. I question my judgement and how I respond in conversions, to validate if I'm not sounding like a complete lunatic.

Memory: this is by far my worst symptom as it made me see numerous neurologists fearing(agoraphobia) that I might be developing thiamine deficiency or wernicke's korsakoff sydrome, terrififed still that this might be the case, even more terrified that if it is the case then I'm permanently damaged. My recall is just THAT BAD!

Physical symtoms; I have little to no physical symptoms at all, no tinnitus, or any other physical symptom. Then again, I was never one to complain about any physical systoms to begin with.

I continue to hold on to the little faith I have left for healing or ever obtaining my mental abilities. But a part of me has came to accept what has happened, I have no expectations, if this is how its gonna feel like till death, then fine. Said too many prayers and had no response. Its in such experiences I'd see why a person would turn to rebuke the existence of a God and become athiest, however, I haven't done that. Still hanging on.

Acceptance makes it a little less harder, by a fragment.

On with the struggle, keep strong guys.

Dave.

Wow, Dave... well done on your attitude. It sounds great. And as far as prayers to God, keep it up. He will hear and answer (unfortunately on his own time, but he knows best). I see what you mean though about the possibilty of a person turning from their faith going through this. However, I don't see how that could help anything. :-) He has some great things in store for us. Do you know the story of Job in the Bible? If not, look it up.

Don't worry about being stuck like this till death... you will heal before that absolutely.

[Luc]

Thank you for your update, Dave! Despite your suffering, I can clearly see that you are much much stronger than ever before. Very important words, "Acceptance makes it a little less harder". Despite this horror of symptoms, you are going to get there. There will come a day when you will post a very positive update on your situation. Keep faith - you are going to beat the WD monster. Please, keep us updated!

[Sheila]

Thanks for the update, Dave. I'm so sorry it is still so hard. As Luc says, you do sound different, though. You have grown or healed somewhat.

I went through a period of a few months in early w/d when my memory was scary bad. That went away, and never came back.

DP / DR are a terrible way to live, but you absolutely will heal. Try to do things that ground you, make you feel more in your body, pay attention to your senses. That will help a tiny bit.

I do think that the neuro damage makes it temporarily harder to "hear" God. You *are* being loved and helped. There is some reason why your healing has to take awhile. Good things *will* come from this "delay."